so close. yet so far.

总觉得最近活得很没意义。
我知道自己的身体在思考，在凭直觉行动。
可是为什么还是无法让自己活出自我？
想哭， 可是哭不出。 =_=
想醉， 却怎么喝都醉不了。


为什么，明明近在眼前的东西。。
却怎么努力去抓也抓不到？

I cried.

how many.

how many fake smiles have i pulled?
how many forced laugh have i threw?
how many times have i lied to my own feelings?
how many times have i swallowed my hatred?
how many times have i said "oh im fine." when im actually deeply hurt?
how many times have i fell, but pretend as nothing has happened?
how many times have i been stab, but have to keep the prick in me?
how many times have i cried to myself?

i'll leave this blank..

Am i needed?
needed by who?
needed for what?
worthy for being needed?
allowed to be needed?

Orz.

最近精神有点绷紧，造成整个人情绪不太稳定。

有了久违的想哭的冲动。。













脑海里想的还是你。。

...(想不出...)

刚才，去了一豪的追思会.
前面的一个小时半，　听了好多人的致辞，　眼睛一直湿湿的，
可是一直强忍着不让它流出来。。



可是，听了家杰的致词后，我眼睛都没眨，就流出两条泪痕。
还好没开灯，我一直盯着银幕，　泪水也一直滑落。

一毫，　又称“光头仔一豪＂．．
你最近好吗？








today was the day that you've been looking forward to.
that's why i didn't tell you how i felt and kept smiling.
because as long as you're happy, that's enough for me.

exam coming.. @_@

well, in a few days time the UEC is coming.
omg, im starting to feel gan cheong about it but my body is still lazy to move. =_=
i actually did my studies. but i dont know if its enough to handle the exam.
and to be honest im thinking about things after the exam.

recently my thoughts have been weird.
一直胡思乱想..
要怎么办才好啊。。 haihz..

but no matter what it is, i wont back off this time.
(i guess. =P)
that's all for now. see what's there to write after the exam.

Peace People! =)









当我听到你的笑声，我所有的疲劳都不翼而飞了。